The Art of Showing Appreciation for Your Partner

Can you recall how the first few things we were taught as a child were to say “sorry” and “thank you”? This nearly explains the importance of gratitude and how it has been instilled in us to express it in every suitable situation and episode of our lives.

Psychological research shows that gratitude is significantly associated with greater happiness and allows for a flow of positive emotions. Showing gratitude is often said to release oxytocin or the “love hormone” or “cuddle chemical” calling for relational satisfaction and deeper connection.

Although expressing gratitude and appreciation holds great importance in a relationship, it can be challenging to express it regularly to your partner and give room for self-doubt and loneliness. This page explores the ways of expressing your love and care for your significant other without just words, talks about signs that you are being undervalued, and suggests methods to show appreciation to your partner.

How to show someone you love them?

Showing your partner appreciation and love can be as easy as saying “ I appreciate you” or “ I love you” but only if you are willing to say it out loud not just through words but also gestures or as the saying goes, “ Actions speak louder than words.” There's no doubt that our chaotic lifestyles have forced us to divert our attention away from our partners leaving our relationships in dilemma and jeopardy. Thus, it becomes a necessity to show our partners love throughout the year in every way possible. Here are some ways to show love to your partner with gestures:

1. Ask them how they have been

It's not just about the simple question, “ How are you?” but includes being interested in little things in each other’s lives. Ask them about their new workplace or the progress on the project they've been working on. This shows you care even about the smallest things in their lives.

2. Send random cute texts.

Randomly send them cute GIFs, funny videos, or sweet messages such as “ I saw this and immediately thought of you” or “ Missing you”. This will show your partner that they are on your mind.

3. Leave a love note

Although you can just always text your partner what you love about them. But there's always something about going out of the way to do something for someone. Leave a handwritten note by the pillow for them to see when they wake up or with the breakfast in bed you made for them to show your absolute love and appreciation.

4. Surprise them

Plan a surprise dinner date to the new restaurant downtown that both of you have been wanting to try, get tickets to their favorite artist’s concert, or buy them something they’ve been talking about. Nothing shines brighter than their face when they see what you did for them and is a great way of showing your love and appreciation.

5. Be an active listener

Listen carefully to what your partner is saying and acknowledge their feelings without interrupting. Ask follow-up questions for better understanding. It's all about creating a safe space and making your partner feel heard and valued.

6. Ask for their advice and opinions

Asking your partner's opinions doesn't necessarily mean it has to influence yours, it simply means you care to know what they have to say regarding a specific topic. Whether it's about an outfit choice or handling trouble.

In a lot of relationships, one partner often feels that their efforts are not being reciprocated or they are not valued enough by their partner. And if this feeling continues to grow, it can slowly strangle the relationship. What if you find yourself in a similar situation like this?

Feeling unvalued and confused?

Have there ever been instances where you felt unvalued and unrecognized for your efforts in your relationship? Usually, it’s a consequence of miscommunication and misunderstanding. But if the feeling of being unappreciated keeps bothering you now and then, it may mean more than just a lack of communication, and your partner might not be treating you in the way you deserve. Pinpoint these signs in your relationship to determine if you're being taken for granted:

1. They are ungrateful

Whether you take care of all the dishes or plan dates and surprises on your own, your partner never seems to be thrilled or ever thank you for your efforts and investment. If your partner is never grateful, they probably have no value for your input in the relationship.

2. They never ask for your advice

Everyone seeks advice from time to time. If your partner never asks for your advice it simply means they don't value your opinions and would rather avoid your interference in their affairs. This is a sign they don't take you seriously.

3. They don’t do occasions

Whether it's birthdays, anniversaries, or occasions that hold great importance to you, your partner nevertheless doesn't seem to care and barely makes any effort to make the day special can be a sign they undervalue you.

4. They don’t reciprocate the availability

If your partner expects you to be available for them anytime they ask but does not reciprocate when you need them can mean they are taking you for granted and don't value your time.

5. They make plans without asking you

When plans are being made your partner often forgets to include you or intentionally does that. When confronted they usually try to avoid the conversation. It can mean that they just do not want to include you in their plans anymore.

6. You don't feel special anymore

If your partner has stopped making efforts to ignite romance in the relationship and doesn't do much to make you feel special, whether it's getting you flowers and expressing love randomly, it could mean they no longer want to keep the relationship thriving.

7. They disregard your feelings

Anytime you try to confront your feelings to your partner and they never seem to listen and validate could indicate that they do not care how you feel or what concerns you.

8. They are unfaithful

If your partner hides things from you, is overprotective of their phone around you, or makes you feel threatened by the involvement of a third person in their life, could be clear signs of unfaithful behavior. Cheating is the ultimatum that your partner takes you for granted and doesn't value you.

Regardless of the setbacks, we all want to fix and save our relationships. While effective communication and active listening can solve much of the problem, there are plenty of other ways to make your partner feel appreciated and valued.

Even if you succeed in making your partner feel loved, their efforts often go unappreciated and sometimes, even unnoticed. Showing appreciation to your partner is just as important as showing love to them and it ain't a Herculean task either.

Ways to show appreciation to your partner

Sit back and try to recall when was the last time you made your partner feel appreciated and loved. If it is taking you longer than a minute to recall, well, there’s a need for self-reflection. If you find trouble in expression, consider these tips to foster gratitude in your relationship:

1. Say it out loud

Do you ever catch yourself looking at your partner and admiring the way they look? Does the thought of how beautiful they are make you blush? Well, don't just keep it to yourself and SAY IT OUT LOUD! Let them know how much you appreciate them.

Did you like the way they handled a situation at work or how confident they were during a presentation? Do you feel proud of them for all the hard work they put in their work? Well, don't sit back and SAY IT OUT LOUD! Show them you celebrate their accomplishments and achievements.

Did you fall for them again at how they presented themselves in front of your friends and family or how they introduced you to theirs? Well, SAY IT OUT LOUD and show them you truly adore them.

Saying compliments out loud and expressing your gratitude and appreciation even for the smallest things will nurture emotional intimacy and greater understanding with your partner. They will feel seen and valued and will further be motivated to do the same.

2. Lend a hand

   

At times due to our busy schedule, we often forget to notice and acknowledge our partner’s efforts and the time they've been investing in their job or at home. Though this might be okay a few times, gradually making a habit out of it is not acceptable.

 Show your gratitude and appreciation towards your partner by acknowledging their efforts and lending a hand wherever possible to weigh down their burden allowing effective collaboration. 

Write a small note, buy them flowers, or bake their favorite cookies to advance your appreciation and respect toward them.

For example, if you feel your partner has been stressed with work lately, step in to first acknowledge and reassure them of their efforts and then pitch in to contribute to house chores while they enjoy a hot cup of tea while admiring you and your participation.  

3. Setting boundaries

Another significant thing about boundaries is that they act as a guide where both you and your partner feel safe, respected, and at ease to express themselves. Boundaries elucidate what’s okay and what’s not in a relationship. They prevent misunderstandings, and conflicts and further build trust between the two. Understanding each other's needs, limitations, and expectations fosters a heightened level of understanding between the parties involved. Respect is a significant player when it comes to feeling validated and appreciated in a relationship.

Likewise, establishing boundaries must be supplemented with patience because changing the dynamics in relationships takes time, so you need to let go of your high expectations and be patient with yourself and your partner to nurture a more positive and supportive relationship. 

Conclusion

Appreciating your partner isn’t just about grand gestures or occasional romantic surprises—it’s about the everyday acts of thoughtfulness, communication, and respect that let them know they’re valued and seen. Expressing thanks, celebrating their successes, lending a helping hand, and respecting their boundaries can allow you to create a basis of trust and intimacy that will deepen your relationship. Every relationship needs nurturing, and appreciation is the nourishment that helps love and connection thrive. Remember, a few small moments of appreciation, a kind word, or an unexpected gesture can make all the difference in helping your partner feel loved. By showing appreciation regularly, you’re not only enhancing your partner’s happiness but also bringing more joy, empathy, and resilience to your relationship. Thus, develop the habit of showing your gratitude—by words, deeds, and an open heart—and see daily how your relationship deepens, gets healthier, and becomes more satisfying.